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Under covers in bed at the hospital carpark and frightened. I’m definitely not doing well at the moment. Bad dreams again didn’t help.

Tomorrow it’ll be cold and wet, starting today depending, and I have nowhere to go. No shelter.
I just cant think of anywhere. I don’t want to go back to the coast and get in the Moruya cycle, although that is the easiest and cheapest. I don’t want to be caught out without petrol either in a place that allows me to stay such as Yass.

Basically this minute I’m hiding from the world, not just nurses and staff arriving around me for work.

10.05 AM

At Weston Park and getting over the banking. Big hits with the inverter, car service including brakes and fan belt, and petrol costs. Heart thumping.

Boiled a coffee to enjoy the view and a fuckwit rolls in radio loud. Ruins it.

Rain has begun. Not much, and it’s not cold as forecast for tomorrow.

I have to work out what to do. And have a shower. Very late in that regard. Might go into civic to the pool. Coffee first.

1 PM

See how far away that blue car is, below? It pulled in beside me then crept forward, radio blaring. It’s disturbing from there. She opened the door, got out to take off a coat, and fucking blasted the place.

It’s like they’ve come to follow me, surround me. I’m at Southlands Mawson. It’ll thump down fairly soon, I wanted to get food supplies in case I stay here which I thought I would – but nit with this loud pollution. i can’t fucking believe it.

2.33 PM

I’ve gone around to the tennis courts and parked the solar panels under a tree. Rain has started to spatter. Been a storm forecast for a couple of days.

Got three deflectors out.

Current radar:

Now that it’s happening and I’ve decided to try staying the night here, fingers crossed, I’m quite enjoying the moment.

3.23 PM

3.55 PM

Most of it has passed and there’s not much in it. Certainly not enough to justify my sleeping here if I’m questioned. I was hoping for a blast. It’s hardly raining now, and pleasant actually.

Vegs are cooked. I put another deflector up and seems the steam went largely out the window.

Very tired now. Big problem potentially is a bunch of tennis players turn up this evening to play, unbothered by a wet court. Hope not.

6.52 PM

Can’t relax because action man arrived about 2 hours ago and hasn’t left. First into the tennis court then golf practise on the waterlogged oval, change shoes again and back onto the tennis court hitting shors against the return wall. Bit of a dickhead, this old bloke. Might be trying to prove something because I’m here. Looks a lot like a goose. Alone, little shitbox car, perhaps a local identity. Has to do sport. Is he waiting for someone? Hitting away. The noise is going to get to me.

One single goose, and I might have to move on.

7.30 PM

I move away. Down the street then up the other side to the big carpark at the top.

A car instantly zooms in with lights pointing inside so I’m busted and can’t set ip again. Checking me out.

8.10 PM. Set up and barricaded in. This will have to do.

6.40 AM. Just finished putting up the curtains, in the hospital carpark. In my cocoon.

Bad dreams again. Woke for the final time at 4AM, coffee, warmed the engine away from the only other overnighters, nearby. Shower in Queanbeyan courtesy of without doubt the best staff and management in the country. Truly wonderful attitudes and people.

This shot while warming the car at the top of tge turnaround taken at 5.20AM. Even now at 6.46AM it’s still dark.

First Inverter Ironing

9.30 AM. Set up the towel on the table. Cleared around. Checked fire extinguisher. Turned on the inverter after turning on the kill switch and it didn’t even beep. Instant green ligjt.

Ironed the shirt, using a spray bottle because the water injection is crap. Worked a treat.

No big numbers on the shunt monitor. No sounds. The iron cycled as it’s supposed to. No battery drop whatsoever. Took maybe 15 minutes. Amazing.

Worked a treat.

3.25 PM

Back in the van in the carpark, with no work done on the eyes. No injections and no laser. Next appointment two months. Doctor is going to see how it goes.

Two bad experiences here though. The ringing noise is particularly bad. So I decided to report it. Said it was harmful. Cranky lady at the desk said I had to fill in a feedback form. I was in red zone low sugar, told her I’m not doing that, to which she got angry at me!

I left straight to the pharmacy for jelly beans and a potato scallop next door. Felt like reporting the worker. What a bad attitude.

Then at the clinic it’s absolutely overflowing everywhere so I ask a couple of hospital people if we could put some chairs there for a woman sitting on the floor with her young son. He argued as cranky as heck, too.

I was polite to both. Possibly too polite, giving them an opening to get into me.

So I’m the bad guy, treated that way, trying to do the right thing by helping. Makes me not want to live.

Hot in the van. I can’t drive because of the drops, and have no place to go and no one to see.

I hope my life ends soon. It’s not good for anything.

7.15 AM. Strange dreams again, feeling very anxious. Lost.

Worried about a smug self-interested doctor, eyesight report, petrol, war and not being able to drive.

All of which have nothing to do with the moment. But constant nevertheless.

This was a lovely view going to the toilets here earlier:

2.30 PM

Back at Brooks Hill. Too tired and vague, not present, to do anything. Did go to Googong Dam but was disconnected.

Googong Dam

Blocked off a steep tight valley section, quite high up, of the Queanbeyan River and not far from town to the south roughly.

Per usual, very badly signposted. Didn’t know where to go. Roads blocked and gated. Abandoned, it seemed.

Found my way around eventually, and enjoyed the landscape despite the brutality done to it.

That’s the photo on BCF website and the model I bought on credit at half price. It’s worth half of the half. That backrest doesn’t work.

I blew it up for the first time down at Canberra lake where the boat ramp and long jetty are. Went out around the corner not far to the left and back. Ten minutes max.

Then packed it up and back here at Brooks Hill I put it in a bag in a tarp on the roof. First cargo up there. Might’ve pulled the rope too tight and ruined it already.

It shits me because it’s a toy, it hurts my back, and I had to buy other stuff to use it,ceg lifejacket.

Unimpressed – with me. Absolutely dreading the unnecessary expense.

If I can use it without pain and it lasts, that’s great, but I doubt it.

6.55 PM

Bucket wash, feels good. No one stopping over yet but a steady stream to the toilets.

I’m tired and all over the place.

I need a good and proper GP doctor. Been on my mind a lot, not just the dreading of the no-energy no-interest judgemental prick of a thing at Moruya, but the holidaying no go bloke I now have, whom I can’t understand.